Taako From Teevhii shares the best bonus scenes from the previous episode of Survivor: Halo vs. Half-Life vs. Hannah Montana: Spotlight World Tour.

This Week In Secret Scenes

“I Can’t Hear Anything”

TLDNW: Ashley has an ear infection.

I’m including this only because it’s a Secret Scene. I wouldn’t include it otherwise. There is something to be said for the fact that this clip got the Secret Scene treatment, but it really boils down to this cast being boring af.

This Week In Confessionals

“The Most Fun I’ve Had In My Entire Life”

I like Ben solely because he’s having fun playing Survivor, and it shows in this clip. He’s coming across very much like Mike Holloway 2.0 in his enthusiasm for the game and a little of his gameplay, though Ben found idols when Mike won challenges. This bubbly side of Ben will probably get him invited back as a returnee in short order. And when the theme for confessionals this week seems to be hangry complaints about not going on the reward, Ben’s confessional makes for a nice palate cleanser.

“I’ve Just Survived”

Take your pick of Dr. Mike clips, either one will do. Essentially, Mike knows that he has not played a good game. He has no real allies, and he is continually failing to vote correctly. Has he worked his way back from the bottom? Or is he just being dragged along? Mike thinks he has a path to victory if he can dominate the endgame from here or if his Healer friends throw him some votes or if the jury respects his ability to survive (but apparently not to thrive?).

But really? Mike owns gameplay as “skidding along for one more day.” Even though he wouldn’t ever say it on camera, Mike knows that he’s not going to win. His body language, tone, and coded strategy talk say it for him. It’s really kinda sad to see someone who knows that they won’t win. I don’t even think Troyzan knew that he’d finish in third place until it happened.

“We Need To Keep All Of Our Options Open”

I’m reticent about going out of my way to focus on Chrissy, but here we are. In the first 40 seconds, Chrissy tells us that she was happy to be randomly paired with Devon because she hasn’t talked with him and this reward is apparently her best opportunity to do so. Which … I mean … I’ll put it this way so I don’t start off on a rant. Chrissy, you all live on a beach together. And there’s only six of you. Instead of waiting for random luck, just go talk to Devon.

The real thing that’s worth talking about in this clip is Chrissy’s plans from before talking to Devon at the reward. Chrissy wanted to vote out Ben and Devon first, saving Ashley for F4. With Devon on board with her and Ryan, Chrissy then decides that they should vote out Ben first and Ashley second. Which makes Chrissy’s pivot to “Fuck y’all, I’m voting Ashley. Deal with it,” a real sharp turn. If you want to give Chrissy the benefit of the doubt, you could say that she only voted for Ashley after Ben played his idol. If you don’t want to do that, you point to Chrissy’s declaration on the beach that she would vote for Ashley without knowing about Ben’s idol. Either way, I think this clip just underscores that Chrissy isn’t the strategic genius she pictures herself to be, simply because her strategy is so incoherent.

Also, Chrissy and Ryan seem super committed to taking each other to FTC, which doesn’t really make sense to me because they’re just going to split the two votes they get.

This Week In Ponderosa

“What’s My Thing?”

I said last week that Lauren’s Ponderosa was the most fun Ponderosa of the season, but Ashley’s quickly matched (and possibly surpassed) Lauren’s. We saw more of her personality in this video than we did across thirteen episodes (and same for JP in his 20-second cameo).

We also get Ashley and Lauren talking about what it means to be a strong and capable woman. As a dude, it’s really not my opinion that matters, but y’all should watch this part of the clip all the same.

And then we get to the back half of this Ponderosa, which is overly meta and still somehow entertaining. Ashley trying to find “her thing” for Ponderosa ends up being “her thing” for Ponderosa. This is self-aware and ironic at just the right levels, and it gave us the choice quotes, “Ew, you’re sweaty, Cole,” and “You want me to drown?”

This Week In Gifable Moments

When you’re extremely and sincerely grateful.

When you think this gif is about you, but it’s really all about Ben’s mugging for the camera.