Taako From Teevhii gives you something to skim shares the best bonus scenes from the previous episode of Survivor: Gremlin Skerry.

This Week In Secret (Extended) Scenes

”Sending The Pirate To Ghost Island”

“Riding on the boy train.”

Ahem. … Phrasing.

Well, it’s certainly been a minute since I’ve done this, so I guess that’s as good a warm up as any. But I dunno, there’s much here in this Secret Scene (story of the season). At least we got to see Sea Bass swing his yurn-smashing hammer like a toddler with a Fisher-Price tool set.

And here’s the question that I’m really thinking about (as there wasn’t much to see in this clip): Did Kellyn really screw up her advantage? I don’t know that you can come down strongly either way. Did she maximize its value? Absolutely not. Did the way that she played it hurt her chances long term? Probably yes. But she accomplished her own objectives entering that Tribal. This “screw up” is subjectively defined to be so by Production, and they’re just including it here to clown on Kellyn. Which, I should clarify, I’m good with. But this season’s theme is (read: has been) unravelling apart before our eyes. Any pretense of reliving iconic Survivor moments has been abandoned. By now, even the most casual viewer should see that Ghost Island’s sole purpose is to maximize the chances of Advantageddon 2: Vote Hard With A Technicality. I don’t love that Survivor is making me sound like the colonizing catacomb corsair Indiana Jones, but maybe these Survivor Relics™ belong in a museum (and not in the game).

This Week In Confessionals

”I Want To Take A Shot At Them”

This clip is submitted without comment.

”My Own Journey”

RuPaul Charles practically lives in the Problem-Attic, but RuPaul’s words always ring true here: “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”

This is a clip for all the Bechtold Buffs where we get a glimpse into Kellyn’s backstory. We knew that Kellyn was a recent divorcee, but I don’t think that’s really been made clear in the main edit. Here, Kellyn tells us that the concept of putting others before herself was ingrained in her (and I’ll vouch for that being a Midwestern tendency). But that’s a quick way to find yourself pulled under by mental and emotional riptides. The solution isn’t always divorce (Do some people jump to divorce too early without actually addressing and working through their problems? Yes. Do some people also never consider divorce when they should because of their misconstruing of the idea that marriage is hard? Also yes.). But some sort of self-care is important for all of us, and that can look like just taking time to relax and/or to do things that bring you joy. And it’s not a bad thing if that activity brings you and only you joy. So that’s why I’m including this clip: to advocate for self-care. It’s 2018, and we all fucking need it. Also, I didn’t want to hear from Kellyn fans if I didn’t include this clip.

Quick Hits

Domenick says that almost five weeks into the game, he still feels mentally sharp (even on three hours of sleep). If Wendell’s Immunity Challenge flub was shown to foreshadow a mental error that will cost him the game, this clip would have been included to juxtapose Dom and Wendell, right?

Angela thinks that Sea Bass would be a lock to win if he made it to FTC. We’ve all known for weeks that Domdell was getting all the votes at the end, but the exclusion of this confessional from the main edit makes the death knell ring louder for Sea Bass’s chances.

Survivor has changed Donathan’s life by inspiring him to work out more when he gets home. I can only hope that he does so to take names and break records. Make that kick-ass coffee to conquer the world, Donathan!

This Week At Ponderosa

”Sorry, I’m Just Rambling To Myself. Is That The Point?”

I’m prone to rag on recruits who clearly don’t know their Survivor history. But here, Kellyn knows too much about Survivor. When Dr. Joe tells Kellyn her weight loss, she says, “It’s no Kelley Wentworth.” Do y’all know what that’s supposed to mean? And when she first sees herself in the mirror, Kellyn first expresses her shock at how different she looks and then quickly pivots to how Survivor greats like Jay and Aubry have looked at themselves in this same Ghost Mirror. Kellyn seems a bit too excited to see the sausage get made. I love to watch a player who’s excited to play the game, but this is like when you watch Night At The Museum without the letterbox and you see the boom mic and the cables on the ground. The lampshading really takes you out of it.

Kellyn’s guidance counselor background really comes through with Survivor Sunshine. Getting everyone to write encouraging and friendly letters to each other is a fine thing to do in this adult summer camp called Ponderosa, and it flushes out Kellyn as a person outside of the game. But let’s also not pretend that it was fantastic television or anything. If there’s one thing I appreciated about this clip, it’s that Kellyn was a counselor, a profession that requires strong interpersonal skills and great social intelligence, and she failed to talk to Libby once over the course of a week that they spent together.

This Week In Gifable Moments

When a witch wants to tell you that Cambodia is a bad season but you won’t fall for her trickery.

When your cat is a cold, unfeeling a-hole but also a needy baby.