Three tribes. Double episode. Are we really gonna predict 6 different people?

No. No we are not. It’s just excessive, non? Instead, we’re sticking to one per tribe, but you get credit whether they are the first or second boot (even if the same tribe goes to two tribals).

Staff Predictions

Andy

I don’t see Kama going to tribal council, but if they do… sure, why not take out Joe before the merge? Especially since you’re still living in the camp he helped build. Plus, I get the feeling the former Kama’s are itching to play Survivor and most of their bond is centered around “us not returnees”. Joe is the only option to scratch that itch and fulfill that bond.

Things didn’t go very well for David this week. Almost like he was right that leaving Kelley in the game was dangerous for him! So he’s the obvious man out, except… when has Wardog ever done the expected next move? Nope, instead he’ll target Lauren for whatever reason (keeping returnees as shields, splitting up another power duo, her not eating, her suggesting they vote out David, you pick). But Kelley won’t go for it and pull David instead. Wardog will be a casualty of his own aggressive game play.

As for Manu, we see a possible women’s alliance move against Eric. And those always work! Another option would be to use either that or the presence of Wendy to blindside Aubry. Or… you could just get rid of the disruptive presence around camp that’s annoying the hell out of you and is way too unpredictable to be used as a tool in the game. I say they do that and turf Wendy. She will then have the best odds of annoying people into raising the white flag  on The Edge of Extinction.

Which brings me to a rant (feel free to skip ahead to Brad’s prediction). Since I’m not going to be on the podcast for the next couple of weeks (and indeed probably won’t be commenting at all), I want to get this off of my chest: Wendy has now gone past “interestingly bad player” to “needs to be off of my television yesterday”.

Her act is so transparent. She is the kooky coworker you’ll walk the long way around the building to avoid. She is Debbie without the water felony. I know she’s engendered a lot of sympathy around these parts (“these parts” being “the internet”) because you can empathise: maybe you’ve been the weird kid that people don’t understand. Maybe you’ve been on the outside of a group of people and had that status be known.

But here’s the thing: it didn’t have to be that way for Wendy. We SAW Wardog and David try to bring her in on the first vote. But she refused. It was more important to her to show her allegiance to someone she met three days prior and was about to (for all she knows) leave the game forever. And thus Wendy sent as clear a signal as she could that she didn’t want to be a part of their group by voting for Lauren (and has kept sending that signal by voting for Kelley). I see no reason why those two in particular should feel any need to bring her into their group.

Then we get to the chicken bullshit. Not only is it foolish to raise such a big stink over hungry people wanting to eat in a social game where people decide whether or not you get to stay, they even gave her a bit of an out by asking if she were vegetarian. They tried to (begrudgingly) be respectful of a core belief. BUT SHE ISN’T!!! I can’t IMAGINE how maddening that would be. She’s not doing it because it’s a core belief (lest you think she had a change of heart, her “animals are people too” stance this week included the argument “why not just eat fish?”. Which, last time I checked, are not vegetables). She’s doing it to get attention.

Which brings us to the trump card in the Wendy sympathizer argument. Last week’s secret scene:

This is a bad look for the non-Wendys. It’s a bad look because they’re on the inside and she’s on the outside and they can afford to be charitable, even empathetic and lose nothing. Now, I’ll admit right now that I can relate to the idea of bonding over shared dislike of someone. Anyone who has gathered with coworkers to complain about a shitty boss or a blowhard colleague has done that. But it’s a bad look to do it to someone of a lower station (it’s why we take shots at Reddit and not other fan-created podcasts/sites. We like to punch up; not down). It’s easy to watch this and feel like Wardog and Kelley and Rick were picking on someone on the outs to make themselves feel better. In fact, David was THERE and felt like that’s what was happening.

And this is worse because Wendy was hurt. Now, it should be pointed out that she’s hurt, not disabled. You might not think the distinction matters (fair), but for me, one is a shitty thing to do, the other makes you a shitty person (think of how different it is to make fun of a limp caused by a bruised ankle than it would be if they made fun of her Tourette’s). But still man, not cool. If you’re out on these people forever based on this minute and sixteen seconds, I understand.

However… WERE they making fun of her injury? I mean… maybe? But, they were also definitely making fun of the little ass stick she decided to use as a crutch. That was the entire bit Wardog was doing. Rick was riffing off of it with the top hat remarks. And, well… the stick is fucking ridiculous.

That thing is not providing any support for a limp. It’s a silly affectation. They ask her if she wants a taller stick and she doesn’t respond (kinda like when they asked her to vote with them and she refused). Using a thigh-high stick as a crutch is about as a effective as, say, “rescuing” some chickens that will eventually be rounded up by production to be slaughtered by locals.

I MUST CLEAR THIS UP. Chickens are NOT a native species to Fiji. Because they were released, production will recapture them after the season and then give them to locals, who will KILL THEM. I was a vegetarian for 2 years, but let’s not be idiotic, we were absolutely starving.

— Victoria Baamonde (@veebaamonde) March 14, 2019

So why do it? Why hop around with a little ass stick? Why put “rescue chickens” on your Survivor bucket list while still eating buckets of chicken at home? Why wear a necklace that says “Big Wendy” on it and refer to yourself as the same in confessionals? All for the same reason: FOR ATTENTION. And friends, that type of person can be EXHAUSTING to be around. Especially if they’re also trying to vote you out. Especially if you’re tired and starving and that exhausting person is actively trying to keep you from eating. It’s cool that you think she’s a sympathetic ray of sunshine, but it’s a little instructive that no one who has been around her for more than three days on this show seemed to agree. Even David, her biggest defender and supported, seemed absolutely baffled and exasperated by her.

So I’m out. Wendy is my pick to go home this week, and every other week I’m gone if she survives. Which she probably will.

Brad

Kama: Joe
Manu: Aubry
Lesu: Fat Log

Listen to the pod.

Emma

Lusee or however it’s spelled: Things look bad for David numbers-wise, and the previews make it look like Lauren could be targeted, but I’m going to go say that Wardog (I’m saving my fake names for the podcast) will play too hard and David will vote with the women to save himself.

Manu: Last season, it always looked like it was going to be Christian in the previews until it didn’t. And that’s when he went home. So with the previews showing that Eric could be the target, I’ll go ahead and say Wendy. Plus this is for two boots so.

Kama: I don’t think they’ll lose, but if they do, cutting Joe right before the merge is actually a good time to do it. So sure, let’s go with that.

John

Oh, I’m sorry, are we writing fucking novels now, Andy? Is this Purple Rock Predictions or Purple Rock Prose? Side note: Hey, did you guys notice that the question marks spell PRP?

Anyway, It’s put up or shut up time for getting rid of returnees, and I’ve decided that this week someone will put up.

Aubry tribe- Aubry goes home as the tribe convinces her they’ve got an easy Wendy vote this time. And Aubry, having met Wendy, thinks that seems pretty reasonable- and thus doesn’t play her idol.

Kelley tribe- We’ve already seen Coleslaw mention that he likes having Kelley around as a shield. The thing is, David isn’t really a shield. Especially not in a game where there are still four returning players left. So this time, Corndog sides with Kelley again and gets David out.

Joe tribe- It feels like wasted effort to even discuss Joe’s tribe, so I’ll put zero thought into this and say it’s Joe this time. Just because I want to see more of Joe’s face on this site. There really isn’t enough of it lately.

Mark

Manu: Hate to say it, but Wendy is the odd bird out here. Yes, we keep predicting her, but is there any chance Aubry lets her get to the merge after her chicken stunt?

Lesu: I’m still reeling from the loss of Rick, but Lauren’s troubles make her too easy of a pick, and I’m betting against myself that David survives. So with a merge coming, let’s go with Balrog. Photog? Wardog? That guy.

Kama: You know why Julia doesn’t matter? Because she goes pre-merge. Oh wait, no it’s because Joe keeps winning. But if he doesn’t… then the editors will show players writing “J-U-L-I-” before cutting away and picking a vowel out of a Scrabble bag. Hey, there are more entertaining ways to go out, Julia.

Matt

Lesu: Well it really doesn’t look good for David here. I mean Lauren has an idol, Kelley and Warthog seem tight. David definitely seems on the outs. But what if everyone finally gets annoyed with Corn Dog and turns on him? It could totally happen right? right? Nah, it’s David.

Manu: This could potentially be interesting if people again decide to not vote Wendy out despite the fact that they all recognize they should definitely vote Wendy out. I think the guys will be dead set against her. Freeing the chickens and depriving them of meat will really be their biggest reason to oust her. I think Aubry will be looking for a way to keep her since she really doesn’t have good allies. So it comes down to Victoria. I could see her ousting either Gavin or Eric, but I also think she is planning to take out the returnees, as she has said in the past. But they will go for Wendy before Aubry to isolate Aubry and remove the chicken freer.

Kama: I mean not gonna happen but if it did, maybe they would take out Joe? You know take that shot while he doesn’t have the idol and before the merge, which is coming very soon? I could see it happening.

	Andy	Brad	Emma	John	Mark	Matt	Readers
2nd Boot	Wendy	Keith	Wendy	Wendy	Keith	Wendy	Wendy
3rd Boot	Wendy	Wendy	Wendy	Wendy	Wendy	Wendy	Wendy
4th Boot	Wendy	Aubry	Kelley	Aurora	Wendy	Aurora	Wendy
Kama 5th or 6th Boot	Joe	Joe	Joe	Joe	??? Julia	Joe
Lesu 5th or 6th Boot	Wardog	Wardog	Wardog	David	Wardog	David
Manu 5th or 6th Boot	Wendy	Aubry	Wendy	Aubry	Wendy	Wendy
Score

Your Turn

Time to vote for the next person to probably not leave the show.