Brad shares the best bonus scenes from the previous episode of Survivor: David vs. Goliath.

This Week In Secret Scenes

”Look At You, Uncle Ben”

Let’s replay this scene after a few more episodes when the castaways have only been eating white rice and coconut for three weeks. I mean really, have you ever seen players this excited for white rice and coconut? Like the meal they’re sharing, there’s really no meat here; but if I had to dig deep, I would point out how hunky-dory the Goliath tribe seems. If the Goliaths run the table in challenges and Ulong the Davids, will they manage to finish the job when the merge hits? Or will they crumble and fall apart? (Also, for the theorists who try to read into Probst’s pre-season hype of a season, could he be down on a season because the theme didn’t play out and not because a woman won? Like if David didn’t beat Goliath?)

This Week In Confessionals

”You’ve Got Security”

Here’s what’s up y’all; this is the first of five confessionals this week, and the last one is the only one you need. But anyway, here’s Davie.

He seems very confident of his place in the game after finding his idol, and he should be. But he’ll need to be careful that he doesn’t get overconfident. An Idol can protect you, but not in the ways that an Immunity Necklace can. Davie still needs to play the idol correctly, not to mention that he needs to plan for what happens after the idol is spent and used. So to say that he doesn’t need to worry about “the people who are making eyes with you or not making eyes with you or the people who are annoyed with you” is inaccurate and/or supremely worrying. There’s also some talk about planting a fake idol in the spot he found the real idol, so that might raise or lower your opinion of Davie. The capper for this clip is Davie calling the idol “his slingshot;” so for all the people wondering where the slingshot is in the David vs. Goliath season, there you go.

”I’m In A Good Spot”/“”I’m A Touchy-Feely Guy”

For as long as they’re pretending to be platonic but still snuggling in the shelter, Kara and Dan are going to be considered an item. So let’s talk about their confessionals together.

Starting with Kara, I actually do think that she’s not going home soon. But that’s no guarantee, especially because her “alliance” has the potential to make a majority of 6 but has not actually done so yet. Kara, Natalia, and Angelina have an actual alliance; any other voting bloc is purely theoretical at this point. So don’t count those chickens before they hatch. The fact that Kara and Dan’s relationship has been witnessed by the entire tribe won’t help their cause in pulling votes to their side. And while Kara says that they’re doing better about keeping that on the DL, the “power couple” bell can’t really be un-rung.

Speaking of which, are they actually doing better about keeping their relationship on the DL? Dan is gushing about how great life is because he’s spending it with Kara. His perfect day is just him and Kara, alone on a Fijian beach. Sure, I’m positive that Dan is totally keeping his feelings under wraps outside of confessionals. And they’re still snuggling (platonically) at night? Even though I don’t expect either of them to know this, Kara and Dan ought to remember, “Watch how they sleep at night.” The best way to read the playing field is to analyze who’s where in the sheltah.

”I’m The Jockey”

Slippin’ Jimmy really has the potential to make the merge. He seems like the kind of guy who would be able to twist out of the tight binds that he’ll almost definitely be in soon. Will he be able to maneuver past that point though? I think it really comes down to how hard he comes out of the gate post-merge. He could end up with the same fate as Jeremy or Josh in San Juan del Sur or as Zeke in either of his seasons; they held off until the merge to kick it into high gear, and they still didn’t reach the end game. This could also be academic if the Goliaths sweep the Davids in challenges and there are no tribe swaps; Nick won’t be making his way into a Goliath alliance, and he could be booted by Goliaths who want the Davids eradicated. Nick’s only chance is with the alliance he has right now, so he better not fall out of their good graces.

”Natalie, Natalie, Natalie …”

We need Jeremy as a narrator, but we definitely don’t deserve him.

This Week In Gifable Moments

When you’re asking if they want to play a game.

When you’re definitely reading the room right.

When you don’t really have anything for this gif but you need to include it anyway and you’re kinda done writing for today cool aaand post.