Australian Survivor: Champions vs. Contenders Episodes 5-6 “Bury Your Gays”

Kemper Boyd

To quote the great Luke Toki, what up motherf-ers! It’s time to deal with more of my opinions!
This season may be very poor on ethnic diversity but it has managed to cast two lesbians. Survivor hasn’t had a queer woman since Kelly Remington in Worlds Apart and it wasn’t even mentioned. In Moana and Jenna we have two out queer women for the first time since Vanuatu.

Episode 5

  • We open with a scene of Moana bonding with Mat, Mat has her idol. I fear we have had way too much Moana early on for her to survive to the merge.
  • Paige, it’s easy you can’t trust the boys. Link up with the girls.
  • Urgh Zach.
  • Jenna feels shit because of her injury. Fairplay Jenna, I tore all the ligaments in my ankle at University and it’s been messed up for years because of that. Hurt like hell too.
  • At the Reward Challenge Paige gives way way too much info about the last vote. It’s the FFGCSDT memorial barrel racing challenge for an afternoon at a pub. Robbie chats a lot of shit. Champions win another reward.
  • Urgh Zach.
  • The pub looks awesome but as a Brit I don’t understand one thing; how are you eating a pie without gravy? With red sauce? cretinous behaviour from the convicts.
  • That photo of Jackie smiling at a rubix cube was fantastic!
  • This really puts into perspective what level of celebrity Shane Gould must be in Australia. One of those household names you don’t realise isn’t famous in any other country.
  • The immunity challenge: Jenna gets to ride in a helicopter to go get x-rays! Missy was forced to walk on a crutch made by Keith Nale. Mate, she should just be medevaced properly.
  • Champions win immunity!
  • It seems sensible to vote of Jenna at this point. She can barely walk.
  • Paige telling the Champions everything is coming back to bite her as Anita doesn’t like her talking to the enemy.
  • Jenna comes back in a cast. A fucking cast! There is no break but she’s fucked up her ligaments.
  • Tegan and Zach both want to keep Jenna. Tegan’s emotions about maybe voting for Jenna are not a good sign for her future game play.
  • Jenna is unanimously voted out. It’s a heartbreak to see a player who wants to be there, wants to play hard both physically and strategically get essentially medevaced. I feel for Jenna. That sucked.
  • I feel like this season desperately needs a swap now. The dynamics are too set in each tribe and if I have to watch Zach be a dick to Paige for very little reason again I’m going to scream.

Episode 6

  • Shane has forgotten about feeding the chicken. Mat says one of them has to go. Shane wants to find an idol.
  • It’s amazing how poor the diving is in the 1968 Olympics video!
  • Paige is in a really bad spot. The boys tried to vote her out. Anita doesn’t like her. Where can she turn?
  • Urgh Zach.
  • Moana isn’t able to keep anything down. Could this be the way we lose the star of the season so far?
  • Reward Challenge is a tug of war for bacon and egg rolls. Champions win. Zach acts like a massive prick. The contender s have to then pick to Champions to compete for an extra special breakfast, Mat v STeve and Steve wins, Mat then has to pick a Contender to take with them for reward. He obviously pick Paige because she’s on the outer.
  • The pick of Steve v Mat was very dumb. Why not go Jackie v Shane? to not give power to a big physical threat, to not give extra calories.
  • At the reward Mat asks Paige about the tribe and she tells him that they don’t trust her. She wants to go after Zach. She spills literally all the information. Paige, girl, what are you doing? Keep something back.
  • Shane goes for an explore after the reward. The whole tribe knows and laughs. She actually find the idol under the ice coffee barrel but every one sees her grabbing it. They ask her what it is and she just walks off.
  • She tells people it’s a clue.
  • Paige comes back and didn’t tell her tribe anything. Anita is even more set on voting her off.
  • Immunity Challenge: transport tribemates in a cage then a Reynolds throw things at things challenge. Contenders win!
  • Moana is worried that her illness will put her in danger.  Jackie wants to vote out Mo. It makes sense, she’s ill and she’s a cast iron member of the alliance with Mat, Sharn and Steve. Jackie and Monika want to vote Mo, flush Shane’s idol then get rid of her next. Not bad but a recovered Mo would be better to have instead of Shane by a long way.
  • Lydia and Sam want to blindside Jackie.
  • At Tribal we hear about challenge strength. Sam straight up tells Shane she better play her idol if she has it. Mo is very ill. I find Sam’s personality very very annoying. Mo then does something really stupid and announces she wants to quit because she’s a team player and she’s only bringing the team down. her close allies of Mat and Sharn try to convince her not to do it. We vote. Shane plays her idol. Moana is voted out.
  • This is truly gutting. In two episodes we lose our two strongest physical female players in Jenna and Moana. We lose the star of the season so far in Moana and we are left with a cast that is 100% straight and has only one PoC left in it.
  • I understand Moana’s wish to leave. She is very ill and her career and all her earning potential is wrapped up in being the star of the AFLW. She is one of the big stars of the league which is only two seasons old. For her the ability to play next season must be paramount in her mind. She needs to be able to perform so she can earn not only her wage but also build sponsorship momentum. This is one of the issues with a Champions vs Contenders season having an active athlete on the cast. One of the reasons Cydney has turned down casting for a Survivor return so far is that it took her months to build her body back up for bodybuilding competitions.